huge question possible nsfw or triggers

So i know no one in this sub can probably diagnose someone as a sociopath but in my total life that I can remember i have had 2 people close to me die and when I say close I mean close I was sad but I couldn't how my emotions this normally only happens in movies those to deaths were this first time it happened without a movie i get sad and I want to cry but because my mom is crying tells me stop save it for later this room doesn't need more of that right now. is this weird and why do I feel I love my dog more than my family. Fun fact as I was going to continue writing I answered the next question I was going to ask.